Why do we love?

i think this is the worse time of my life. i can never go lower, nothing else can possibly bring me lower, this time i've hit rock bottom. wham! i hit it real hard, just that i'm good at hiding pain, so yeah, you don't see it. i've to make a few major decisions, like really really major, in my eyes la. i've found another of my weakness, i take things too seriously. but i really cant help it, cos i'm living as if tomorrow's the last day of the world. i think that's why i'm worried and care so much about stuff. but some things are way beyond my control. i feel like pouring out my soul on this blog, but i can't cos everybody will read, and there's personal stuff too. and i'm too lazy to keep a journal. you may think that i'm acting, or whatever, i don't care, just don't assume that things are the way you think it is, cos its not. if everything has to be your way, i just don't see the point in staying. if you really really feel so insecure, look to God. you'll definitely find security in him. please, i've enough of this nonsense. i can't take it anymore. don't take matters into your own hand. stop trying to control people's lives, cos its not going to work. if you're trying to control mine, please, don't even try. if you ever, i'm out of here. serious. i've enough of this hypocrisy and all that crap. please don't try to act someone you're not. thanks for trying, but try harder. talk without action is nothing. thanks for showing me who i really am. the real me.