Why do we love?

i've learnt not to talk so much, and just stay in the background. (partly cos i have a really bad sorethroat) it kinda works. you get to hear less of yourself, and just observe the surrounding people. just be quiet and observe. notice i didn't say judge. just observe, and the snide comments can be avoided. i've learnt also that if i want to shut out from the rest of the world, i could, but it would make life more miserable. y'know, you must learn how to draw the line, when to allow people to come in, and when to shut people out. its tough, but sweet.

sometimes i feel like giving up. going for prayers on friday night-they seem like a routine. maybe cos i've got nothing to do on friday nights? planning for cell after school every friday-every thursday i'll msg people to come, and only 5-6 people turn up. every thursday night i'll remember,"crap! haven't think of songs yet." and along with my books, i have to lug a heavy guitar. going for PCM, it seems like i'm wasting a whole afternoon, not learning anything. and my mom obliges me to go.

whoever said the christian walk was easy... nobody said it was easy. it's supposed to be tough to mould you to become more Christlike. really, all i need now is encouragement. it would brighten up my day a whole load.

you are LORD.