Why do we love?

Dear God, I'm sorry, I'm unable to do it. I can't live with the fact that masquerades are all around me when I go out on Sunday mornings. I can't possibly see how to continue when no one's committed. I don't see why somethings are meant to be, when friends become more important than family, when phsyical food more important than spiritual food, when hate is more popular than love, when sex is more worth than true love, when lusts control the media. How do I live in this damned world, when most of the believers have succumbed to worldly pleasures. I'm sorry if i'm starting to doubt the whole motion of this religious thing. It's not that I doubt you God, I know you're so very real in my life, but sometimes it's so damn hard. Y'know? No one's there to guide me, no one's there to help me. How do I continue dragging myself out of bed every sunday morning like that? I have no, for lack of a better word, incentive, except the ever-so-blasting music that the band plays. Somehow I sense that the technicalities have finally caught up to them, instead of being anointed and playing for the sake of an audience of One. Jesus I love you, teach me to be a christian. Teach me how to live this life that's pleasing to you O God.